![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spirit finger
Apr. 17th, 2024 09:32 ami went to the gym with margot and snek monday. i took it easy because i still have a cough. it's still deep and rattling. i have to bring something to spit in on the drive to work because so much phlegm is still coming up. this happened at least once before, a few years ago. i remember going to a doctor telling him i was mostly over a cold, but couldn't quite kick the phlegmy cough even weeks later. the mold inspector came on monday and said he should have results back in a week.
i was right. i want to write again. the little signs were there. i was opening up chapters of my novel and thinking "that wasn't as bad as i remember" or "this is actually good" or "wow well said" and wondering what would happen next. i even want to try to finish more short stories. i need to find a way to stop thinking of them so negatively. i think of them as these tickets into your creativity you have to compose. you sell enough tickets, then maybe someone will let you write a novel.
most short stories i've read are all about the ending. at least, that's why they're renown, as far as i can tell when i finish them. i think of short stories as practicing endings and it's true that's where i need the most help. i've written so much to have written so few endings.
i'm reading ashley's blog again. his actual writing is so full of inane, petty cruelty that i get absolutely zero intellectual or emotional nutrition out of, but his journaling is gentle, humble, and jagged with delightful jabs of vicious humor. i can tell he reads criticisms about his work. he's specifically generous toward other writers. he tells all the tricks he knows. he wants more writers in the world. i think he must be a great teacher.
the people were right. twin peaks season 3 is weird, weird. i'm on episode 6 or 7, i think. now that i can see it's kind of the spiritual re-composition of dale's consciousness, i'm starting to fall in love. i hated the dougie thing at first, maybe because he was introduced in such an obnoxious way. a lot of male directors have this thing where they think, i guess, any scene that has a prostitute in it is hilarious. maybe this is a bad taste still left in my mouth from when these scenes were more like "anytime a prostitute is hurt/killed, it's hilarious" because nothing problematic happened and unproblematic scenes with sex workers are great, but still. it felt like sitting in the theater through a nude scene while a 12-year-old boy snickered in the next seat.
but after dougie at the breakfast table with his kid and the coffee, i'm fully charmed. i've always loved dale and laura's connection, so ever since someone on reddit likened what dale is going through (lost, obviously in need of help to the point that multiple people he encounters point it out) to laura's crisis, i'm even more bought-in. i was hoping for more of the creepy glass ghost-box. wally brando is great. dana ashbrook aged gorgeously.
i was right. i want to write again. the little signs were there. i was opening up chapters of my novel and thinking "that wasn't as bad as i remember" or "this is actually good" or "wow well said" and wondering what would happen next. i even want to try to finish more short stories. i need to find a way to stop thinking of them so negatively. i think of them as these tickets into your creativity you have to compose. you sell enough tickets, then maybe someone will let you write a novel.
most short stories i've read are all about the ending. at least, that's why they're renown, as far as i can tell when i finish them. i think of short stories as practicing endings and it's true that's where i need the most help. i've written so much to have written so few endings.
i'm reading ashley's blog again. his actual writing is so full of inane, petty cruelty that i get absolutely zero intellectual or emotional nutrition out of, but his journaling is gentle, humble, and jagged with delightful jabs of vicious humor. i can tell he reads criticisms about his work. he's specifically generous toward other writers. he tells all the tricks he knows. he wants more writers in the world. i think he must be a great teacher.
the people were right. twin peaks season 3 is weird, weird. i'm on episode 6 or 7, i think. now that i can see it's kind of the spiritual re-composition of dale's consciousness, i'm starting to fall in love. i hated the dougie thing at first, maybe because he was introduced in such an obnoxious way. a lot of male directors have this thing where they think, i guess, any scene that has a prostitute in it is hilarious. maybe this is a bad taste still left in my mouth from when these scenes were more like "anytime a prostitute is hurt/killed, it's hilarious" because nothing problematic happened and unproblematic scenes with sex workers are great, but still. it felt like sitting in the theater through a nude scene while a 12-year-old boy snickered in the next seat.
but after dougie at the breakfast table with his kid and the coffee, i'm fully charmed. i've always loved dale and laura's connection, so ever since someone on reddit likened what dale is going through (lost, obviously in need of help to the point that multiple people he encounters point it out) to laura's crisis, i'm even more bought-in. i was hoping for more of the creepy glass ghost-box. wally brando is great. dana ashbrook aged gorgeously.
